Jane Storegoer and the Cone of Evil, Part 3


I’m taking a badly-needed technology break! To keep you entertained without my daily nonsense, I’m posting the complete stories of Jane Storegoer, a character who sprang to being during the #AtoZChallenge in 2016.  During my break, I’ll post the installments daily. Can’t wait? Catch the rest of the posts here. They start from the bottom. Hope you enjoy!

How deep is this box? thought Jane, bracing herself for the impact. And then there it was, but before she could prepare for certain smashing, the damp cardboard stretched downward as effortlessly as a trapeze net. She sprang up again, back toward the hole in the box, now filled with the ice cream cone’s face.

“Mwaahhh haaaa haaa,” the ice cream cone said, little bits of ice cream showering down, along with a sprinkle or two.

Jane hit her rebounding peak and went down again, this time more relaxed. She’d always loved a good trampoline.

“I don’t think you’re using that laugh right,” she said, striking a pose as she bounced again. She wondered if she could get a little higher, maybe, if she jumped. All the activity was warming her up, at least.

She connected with the cardboard, this time bending as far as she could, and shot up, fast. The ice cream cone’s peanut eyes widened as she came at it, and it tilted back on its waffle apex just as her head and right shoulder made it through the ragged opening in the box top.

“You better move, Ice Cream Cone!” said Jane, compacting herself for her next recoil. That Trampolinercize was really paying off.

“My name is Barry!” it said, hopping back on its cone tip as this time, she nearly got her elbows through.

“Berry?” she said, her hair the last thing to go through the hole on the way back down.

“No, Barry. BA-rry.”

“Still hearing Berry.” She smiled as she descended. She knew what it said, but she couldn’t resist that growing annoyance. This time should get her back up and out.


“Holy ouch,” she yelled, when she managed to get her breath back. She lay sprawled on the suddenly ungiving bottom of the box, her cheek resting in a puddle of…something. It smelled vinegary and a little spicy. Tall, lumpy white creatures surrounded her, each carrying a long, green weapon resting where their shoulders would be.

“We are the Tofurati,” said one of the creatures. “Explain yourself.”

Like my political side? Read my opinion pieces here.

Check out  my full-length novels: 

Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   

Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 

 Her Cousin Much Removed

 The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

Peruse Montraps Publishing.


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