Rewind: Candidly; The Work of Writing Two: #AtoZChallenge

Standard

By Wilson Afonso from Sydney, Australia (Just browsing Uploaded by JohnnyMrNinja) [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

It’s time for a blog rewind! A replay of a previous post, originally published during the A to Z Challenge on April 4, 2017. Enjoy!

Again.

(More Work of Writing Posts.)

 

Once again, this account is completely and totally fictional which means it never happened and is not true and is made up and is fictional.

And definitely not true.

Ah. New day. A good day. A good day to get some real work done. Some serious work. Serious work. Ser-ee-ous.

Let’s just move that remote off of the coffee tabl–DAMN IT!

I’ve never seen a glass spin like that. End over end. I barely tapped it. Barely. And now it’s everywhere. At least it’s only water. Only water, it will dry. And the glass didn’t break. Good. Back to it. Wait, need a little paper towel to blot it up. OK. Blog post then editing.

Blog post. Right. Blog post. Blog POST. Bloggity blog blog blog. Post.

Some more decaf? Yep. More decaf. Ah, that looks good, just blot the bottom of the cup, looks like there’s a little coffee there, and–DAMN IT!

It’s fine, it’s fine, the coffee did kind of jump out of the cup, but at least it didn’t go IN the toaster. A little under, sure but a quick wipe and, yep, we’re ready to go.

Cofffee is set and stable (ha! So funny. I’m a spiller! A spiller who can laugh at herself. Hmm. Maybe write that down). Time for some real work. Serious work. Ser-ee-ous.

Right after I make sure there’s no more coffee under the toaster.

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

 Sign up for my spamless newsletter!

Advertisements

A Chronicle of Jails

Standard

By Roman Köhler [Public domain], from Wikimedia Commons

This flash-fiction story was written in response to this prompt from Fiction Can Be Fun.

First thing is that it wasn’t my fault. None of it was my fault. Not one bit of it.

Yeah, that’s what people always say, isn’t it, that it wasn’t their fault but in this particular case it’s 100% true. One-thousand percent.

Don’t give me that look, I’ve faced much tougher than you. Much, much tougher.

Anyway, I was minding my own business, as I do, walking along the street, when I happened across a plain brown paper bag. You know the kind, right, the ones they use for lunches or for people who can’t breathe. Whichever.

Me being the curious type, I take a peek.

That’s it. That’s all I did. Peek into the brown paper bag. Now I ask you, how many times out of ten do you think peeking in a brown paper bag you find in the street is going to get you into the kind of trouble I got into? How many times of ten do you think? One? Three?

Well it was my unlucky day. Or maybe my unluckiest day. Because whammo, I won the lottery, but the opposite.

All I saw was a bunch of shiny crystals. Some green, some red, some clear. Just crystals as far as I knew right there in that moment out on the street with a paper bag in my hand. They were pretty, sure, we’re all magpies at heart, take something shiny and who doesn’t want it? How does something that glittery not catch your eye?

I told you, it’s not my fault.

Okay, okay, it’s all over your face. You wouldn’t think they were crystals. You, of the ultimate wisdom, you’d think they were some kind of jewels or something, right?

Am I right?

That’s exactly where you’d be wrong. Maybe or maybe not the same thought crossed my mind. Maybe or maybe not when I took my peek of fate—nice ring, right? Peek of fate?—I thought my ship had come in right on the sidewalk in a paper bag.

It hadn’t.

Now see, you’re here too, so you know what happened next. You’re here too, so you know that the moment that first crystal, that red one, hit the freshly polluted Thursday morning city air, it changed and grew and surrounded me until, well, poof, here I am.

Eighteen months I made it out there, hopping through that great beyond, eighteen glorious careful months from Andromeda to Taurus and back again.

Because of a case of mistaken identity, you understand, like I said, it wasn’t my fault.

And even if I was there when that crateload of rare minerals disappeared from the landing bay of Settlement 8403, it doesn’t mean I took them. And it doesn’t mean I sold them to the Usurpians, who, in all fairness to me, I didn’t know had started a whole war thing with us like a standard month earlier. And bad timing on my part doesn’t mean I deserved to be sent to the harshest prison in this quadrant of the universe with its anti-matter locks that obviously can be defeated, no matter what the manufacturer says.

But I’ll tell you this. They can keep me here in the Leo Lockup, because I’m not going to back to the Black Eye Galaxy Prison. Not again.

Stupid, shiny warrant traps.

Check out  my full-length novels: 

Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   

Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 

 Her Cousin Much Removed

 The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

Peruse Montraps Publishing.

#AtoZChallenge Wrap-up and #MAYkingItWork

Standard

Took this yesterday, April 30. Told you it’s spring!

Well, it’s May! After a month of blogging six days a week (and seven in the first marathon stretch…whoa) we’ve glided on through to May. Hello real spring (do you hear me, Chicago weather? What you’re doing out there right now, keep it up), hello MAYkingItWork.

What’s that you say, hypothetical reader? What’s that jumble of letters at the end of that sentence there? We’ll get to that in a second.

So I kind of wrapped it up yesterday, but overall, though this A to Z Challenge was, well, challenging, and I didn’t do as well as I wanted, it was definitely worth the time and effort. Every year it’s like a blogging reset, settling us into the habit of daily posting. And this year, coming up with posts, even with the headaches, wasn’t even that hard.

I think I’d call that growth.

You all know how I did with the visits, but I’ll try to catch up.

So from A to Z to MAYkingItWork. We all have those projects we mean to get to, and we keep meaning to get to, and yet somehow never get to. And they haunt us. They nag at us. They demand our attention. Kind of like the prepositions hanging out at the ends of each of those clauses, but the whole thing is far more awkward to when it’s grammatically correct.

But I digress.

In May, MAYkingItWork encourages you to pick one of those buzzing neglected bees and do something with it. Make some progress. Take a few steps toward finishing it or finish it outright.

This is a no-pressure challenge. So no pressure that it’s more of a support group. So if you’re interested, blog about it and post a link here, or come here and talk about it on Fridays during the month of May. This Friday, we declare ourselves, what we will do.

I’m tempted to make MAYkingItWork my MAYkItWork, given I wasn’t planning on doing it again this year until Breaker of Things sent a gentle nudge, so entirely without his permission I declare him co-host. Debs too, if she wants. Anyone else want in? Let me know.

So, non-hypothetical readers, think about what you’d like to get back to, or even start, if it’s something new. It doesn’t have to be writing if writing isn’t your thing; it can be craft related, home-related, anything. It’s a spring renewal for the dusty parts of the to-do list.

And come let us know what it is on Friday.

Thanks again to all my A to Z buddies, I couldn’t have done April without you, and hey, how much do you rock for completing the challenge?

(Spoiler alert. It’s a lot.)

Check out  my full-length novels: 

Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   

Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 

 Her Cousin Much Removed

 The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

Peruse Montraps Publishing.

Zero

Standard

This is a zorse. Well, technically it’s a hebra (hobra makes more sense I think) because it’s a cross between a female horse and male zebra. By Christine und David Schmitt (originally posted to Flickr as Zorse) via Wikimedia Commons

As in zero-hour. As in here we are, the very last letter of the alphabet. As in zipped through April and  the A to Z Challenge.

Granted, for me about half of April was a blur between two viciously-long persistent migraines. But it almost feels like a cut-scene in a movie, where I sat down to write A and now I’m on Z.

Time is weird.

But you probably already knew that.

Zero is such an odd word. It can mean nothing; it can mean a close examination with the mere use of a preposition (zero in); it can mean the end of something; it can mean a fresh start.

It can mean the number of blog visits I managed yesterday despite my best intentions. Still sorry, all.

Tomorrow’s really the day for a wrap up, so I’ll leave a little in the word reserve, but thank you everyone for visiting this month, even though I wasn’t at my most social. With a clearer head, hopefully will come a longer hop around the interwebs.

Zero days of April left, and only spring ahead. Thanks for sharing April with me, my non-hypothetical readers.

Check out  my full-length novels: 

Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   

Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 

 Her Cousin Much Removed

 The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

Peruse Montraps Publishing.

 

 

Yoga

Standard

Yak in Tibet. By Dennis Jarvis via Wikimedia Commons

So I’ve known I was going to do yoga for Y since the beginning of the challenge. Look at me! Planning!

At the end of February of this year, I decided that I wanted to do yoga daily. It wasn’t a resolution or challenge. It was merely a choice. So most days, I get up and do a short practice on Gaia, where the practices stretch as far as the eyes can see. When I have more time, I do a longer practice later in the day.

I try different styles. I like the vinyasa yoga, the kind that flows from pose to pose, but I don’t limit myself to those practices. Sometimes I do yin yoga, which requires you to sit in a pose for a long time, to be still.

That, for me, is the most difficult.

Yoga is more than the physical movement; yoga shapes the mind as well as the biceps. As I mentioned earlier in the challenge, it’s helping me to let go of the idea of perfection. It’s teaching me to appreciate the body it I have for what it will do and what it will try to do. It’s shown me the vast universe inside of each of us.

It’s shown me that we can each form our own morning rituals, whenever we want them. It’s as easy as making a choice.

***EDIT: If you’d like to try a practice, here is a beginner one for free from Clara Roberts-Oss, one of my favorite instructors on Gaia! Free Practice on Gaia from Clara Roberts-Oss***

Check out  my full-length novels: 

Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   

Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 

 Her Cousin Much Removed

 The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

Peruse Montraps Publishing.

 

Xylocarp

Standard

By marlin harms (Flickr: Xantus’s Hummingbird, Hylocharis xantusii) via Wikimedia Commons

OK, I’m just going to start with this: X words are the worst. The worst. Absolutely the worst of all the letters of all the days in April.

I’ve cheated with X in the past, chopping off bits of words; I’ve used the standards. But today, I decided I would use a bona fide X word that maybe most of us (some of us…me) don’t know.

And here’s the thing with X words. They look cool. They sound cool. But their meanings are dry as toast when the only thing you have in the house is salt.

That’s dry.

Take, for example, today’s word, “xylocarp,” which I chose because it made me think of a fish with a built-in musical instrument, swimming around, adding a colorful tropical musical flare to the reef. The kind of fish that’s the life of the party, who always has a happy tune ready to go.

Xylocarp.

Know what it means?

It’s a hard dry covering, like on a coconut.

I told you. Dry. In both senses of the word.

X is just one of those letters. It looks cool. It sounds cool.

It’s rarely cool.

So I’m going to stick to my improvised definition. Some where, out there, a xylocarp is rocking it out as the anemones dance.

Check out  my full-length novels: 

Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   

Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 

 Her Cousin Much Removed

 The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

Peruse Montraps Publishing.

Well

Standard

Sperm Whale Pod by Gabriel Barathieu, via Wikimedia Commons

Here we are, all the way down at W. So many options for W and I choose “well.”

Oh well.

I came out of the last migraine and ricocheted right into another one thanks to our frenemies at Uncle Julio’s, so I can’t say it’s been my best A to Z, at least when it comes to be being neighborly. There are so many stories I’m WAY, WAY (W!) behind on, so much travel, so many songs, so much so much.

Well, the posts will still be there when my migraine isn’t, I assume. I hope.

When I have one, my ability to absorb what I’m reading goes way down. Something I’ve learned: bite-sized twitter is OK in batches. Posts where I have to synthesize from top to bottom less so, especially when they’re complex.

Thank goodness for coffee! This post is written entirely in it.

There are more external distractions, too, as I watch the circus that used to be our government, and for my friends in distant lands, yes, it looks even worse from over here. But even with it all, I’ve managed to write the posts (WRITING. I’m a WRITER and I didn’t even think of WRITING for W. Oh migraines), so that’s something.

Well, imperfect.

But something.

Check out  my full-length novels: 

Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   

Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 

 Her Cousin Much Removed

 The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

Peruse Montraps Publishing.