‘Orange is the New Black’ Won’t Quit Me

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So it seems as though watching the whole second season of “Orange is the New Black” has wiped my brain clean of anything else. It’s as though it burrowed in, pushing aside all unnecessary information, and by “unnecessary,” I mean anything unrelated to the inmates of Litchfield.

Ooops.

You wouldn’t think a TV show could do that, but it has. Maybe it needs a warning label. “Warning: Consume in reasonable quantities. Binging may result in loss of connection with reality, an overdeveloped sympathy for the incarcerated, and a strange desire to eat off of a plastic tray.”

Who am I kidding? I’d do it again. In fact, I will do it again next year when we get season three.

So you’ll have to bear with me as I return to reality and try to get some synapses firing on some writing of my own. Let’s hope they’re starting to spark, much like a home-made prison lighter.

Oh dear.

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So I Burned Through ‘Orange is the New Black’

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I’m keeping this post spoiler free. Well, I’ve been furloughed, at least for another year, after tearing through season two of “Orange is the New Black.” Do I regret the speed with which I watched it?

Yes and no. No, because I was able to see the whole season completely unspoiled (I hate spoilers) and yes because I used it all up and Netflix just put another 12 months on my sentence of being deprived of new episodes. If they really cared about us, they’d give us a new season once a month (I’m not greedy, and I figure the actors should get a little time to sleep between tapings. The writers, well, writers don’t need sleep, right?).

It was just as good as the first season, and in some ways, better, packed with the human moments that make this show something special. The writing was sharp, funny, and heartbreaking. And the acting was phenomenal. Completely phenomenal.

Uzo Abuba, who plays Suzanne/Crazy Eyes, deserves an Emmy for her outstanding performance. I mean wow.

Anyway, it was definitely worth Friday’s anticipation and then some. If you’re not streaming Netflix, you should be, because you are missing out on television that could shape the medium for decades to come. OITNB may be about prison, but it’s breaking women out of the roles into which they’re usually pinned, and letting them shine in all of their complicated, flawed glory.

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I’m WAAAAAYY too Excited about ‘Orange is the New Black’

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I am so giddy with excitement I can barely type. I’m going to prison, you guys! But don’t worry, I’m only visiting some friends who insist that “Orange is the New Black.” Yup, it’s back, and I don’t think that anyone should be this excited over a TV show.

Except maybe “Doctor Who.”

And “Orphan Black.” And, of course, OITNB. Who am I kidding? If you watched the first season, you’re likely as excited as I am.

We get to see what all the inmates at the fictional Litchfield have been up to since we saw them last. And the most glorious part of all is we can find out as quickly or as slowly as we like. I wish I could say I wasn’t going to binge like a person who’s sworn off sugar suddenly in a land made up entirely of FoodLikeCake’s recipes (and what a glorious world that would be).

But that’s the beauty of Netflix’s system of putting up the whole season at a time. When those credits roll, the next episode is fair game.

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All I Want Is to Be Lazy

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Do you ever have one of those days when all you want is to sit on the couch, a marathon of shows or movies ahead of you, knowing that the only place you need to go is the kitchen?

Yeah, well, today is not one of those days. I kind of wish it were, though.

But it’s not.

Instead, it’s got a to-do list that gets longer every time I scratch something off of it. I’m not an expert in to-do lists, but I thought that they were supposed to get shorter the more you do. Not at this rate.

Nope, the soonest I can have a lazy day is Sunday, though when you think about it, Sunday’s really the prototype for days like that. What I wouldn’t give for another “House of Cards” run of episode after episode, but I did that already, and Orange is the New Black doesn’t come back until June. Everything else is miserly, giving us one measly episode at a time.

I need a new series on Netflix, that’s what I need. I’m open to suggestions.

Oh wait, right. My to-do list. Still, if you have any ideas…you know. In case.