Basic human decency or ground rules


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In this era, so much of what we say seems preposterous to have to say. Combinations of words you never thought you’d have to utter aloud, let alone to a bunch of adults.

Yet here we are.

And now here we are on this blog. As you may know, on Thursdays, I post a photo prompt for a 10 word story. This week, someone made a comment about tiresome, boring things “across the pond” and linked to a 10-word story that, at best, poked fun at sexual assault survivors; at worst, called into question their integrity.


Absolutely not. I deleted the comment, replaced it with my own, and blocked that user from this blog. No second chances, no explanations, no “lighten ups” and no “it was just a jokes.”

Utterly unacceptable.

If you cannot treat other people with dignity and respect, I do not want to play with you. And that means treating everyone with respect, regardless of race, religion, orientation, gender identification, all of it.

This is a fun place, a respite and all are welcome here. If you think it’s fun to make people uncomfortable or to poke at people’s pain, you are not welcome here.

I know statements like this tend to bring out the trolls who want to test the system. In fact, I suspect that story was the work of a particular troll who doesn’t think I see him.

Oh, but I do.

So let’s continue to have fun and treat everyone with dignity and respect. I know that seems to be going out of fashion, but not here.




Ruling on Rules


Image result for gif india trafficI’ve always been a rules person. Take a number; hands inside the car at all times; no sweatpants outside. I respect rules.

But sometimes the rules don’t serve us. Sometimes the rules form tiny little parallel fences that keep us on our tight little paths. Sometimes, you kinda want to wear sweatpants outside.

Rules fulfill a purpose by helping us maintain order within our lives and beyond. Imagine a busy fast-casual restaurant where the line had never been invented.

Terrifying, right?

But sometimes rules keep us comfortable, complacent. Sometimes we use them not as guidelines, but as crutches. As bases for “can’ts.”

I’m not an advocate for chaos. I think civilization is one of humankind’s greatest achievements.  Or near-achievements, given that we don’t all seem to be quite civilized.

But I digress.

Once in a while, we need to take stock of our rules. Of our shoulds and shouldn’ts and musts and mustn’ts. We need to look at which rules serve us, and which rules serve as comfortable barriers. As nice, cozy self-imposed limitations.

None of us are planted in pots. We have the freedom to grow out and up and beyond.

We need only give ourselves the permission.


Philosophy of Nail Polish


So for a friend’s birthday a few weeks ago (hi friend! She’s a regular reader of this blog) we went to a spa, and I got a manicure. I haven’t had a manicure in I don’t know how long, given that the only thing I think about my nails is whether they’re starting to get to that annoying length where they get to the keys on the keyboard before my fingers.

I loved the painted nails. They were an opaque, pale green.

When I’d get them done before, I’d always stick to the light shades of pink, nothing too noticeable, something professional. And then it struck me that I didn’t have to do that anymore. I could pick any color and run.

After the polish chipped away, as it always does (I’m not really up for the no-chip manicure, given the removal process) I missed the color. So I went to one of my favorite spots on the planet, my neighborhood Walgreens, and picked some out. A different shade of green; a bright, light shade of blue. And I painted them myself.

I don’t think I have a future in nails.

But it showed me that I’ve been clinging to rules that no longer apply. And that’s it: when things change, so can you.

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