#MondayThoughts: Messing up crafts with Isa

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It’s wildly sunny today, and if this wasn’t Chicago in January I’d be tempted to believe it’s warm and springlike. But it is Chicago in January, and a very toasty 38 degrees. That’s F, not C and to save you the google, C friends, that’s 3.3 degrees C. Which isn’t terrible, but it’s certainly not the high 50s, low 60s it looks like.

I told you that January sun is a trickter.

It was a bit of a busy weekend, I got a Cricut machine as a gift and I’m learning how to use its incredible range of functions. One of the best things about getting into something like this so late in the game is no matter the question, someone has the answer.

Yesterday, I was eyeing my collection of yoga mats accumulated over the years, and they just didn’t fit in the box I’d made for them. Meanwhile I had a huge box from Amazon I hadn’t taken out yet. I went through the craft supplies I had on hand, realized I had a lot of removable wallpaper left from another project and set to math.

That’s right. I mathed. I measured the box, got the square inches, and then measured the length of the paper I had and it was enough with a bit of overage.

It did not go smoothly, the project or the paper, as it wasn’t the heaviest weight, but by the time I got around to the front, I had a method.

Then I used the machine to cut a vinyl silhouette of a woman in tree pose for the heck of it, and project done with only what I already had availalble.

It was no craft video, with everything working perfectly the first time, as though wrinkles and air bubbles had never been invented.

But I’m pleased.

Perhaps more so because of the lack of perfection.

Anyway, that’s it for me, have a great Monday and be creative, even if it doesn’t work as well as you’d hoped.

Check out  my full-length novels: 
Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   
Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 
Her Cousin Much Removed
The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.
And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s quick and weird and FREE!
Peruse Montraps Publishing
See what I’m writing on Medium.

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#TuesdayThoughts: Confessions

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On Sunday I braved some frigid, frigid temps to go to Michael’s and buy yarn. So much yarn.

So very much yarn.

In my defense, I had a great coupon. And the yarn was on sale. But purchases beget other purchases and now I need something in which to store all that yarn.

I did get a reusable shopping bag where I have the yarn for the project I’m crocheting right now, and it’s got a zebra with a crown of flowers and I ask you, how does a person resist such a thing?

How?

Besides, right now, crochet is a thing that I need. There are worse habits to feed.

It’s still frigid, but it’s gleaming outside like an ice cube, the sky a bright, cool blue except at the horizon, where even now there’s a faint band of color. Maybe the sun didn’t feel like getting up this morning.

I get it.

This is January in Chicago, determined sunshine with no warmth at all, and it’s its own kind of beautiful.

Less beautiful is the state of my manuscript, so I’m going to get on to that. I hope you have a fabulous Tuesday.


Check out  my full-length novels: 
Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)   
Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) 
Her Cousin Much Removed
The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.
And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s quick and weird and FREE!
Peruse Montraps Publishing
See what I’m writing on Medium.

#AtoZChallenge: Glue

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By Rob Hooft (Own work) [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC-BY-SA-3.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/)%5D, via Wikimedia Commons

Want to glue your eyes to a page?  Aunty Ida is only $0.99 for a limited time! It’s almost over, grab your copy now!

I bought glue from the dollar store once, and it didn’t stick to anything. It didn’t make anything stick together. If you stuck your finger in it–which I did with a recent project–it felt slippery.

Slippery glue.

I have no idea what was really in that bottle. It was white, like the school-project favorite, Elmer’s, but it certainly didn’t didn’t have its glueyness. Anything you applied it to curled up, defiant, uninterested in being attached.

“Things fall apart,” as Yeats wrote.

Things Fall Apart, as Chinua Achebe echoed in the title of his brilliant book about post-colonial Nigeria.

“Things fall apart,” say I, about dollar store glue. But not only dollar store glue.

The center cannot hold.

 

 

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management.

 Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only) ($0.99 for a short time)  and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

 Sign up for my spamless newsletter!

Our Show is Coming! Our Show is Coming!

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Well, you may have seen a post or two about the sketch comedy writing I do…awkwardly, for me, sometimes, but I do…and we have another show opening soon! October 1, in fact, in Donny’s Skybox Theater at Second City, at 7 pm!

We run for 4 weeks, though we have a break on October 15. So our show dates are (everyone get your calendars ready!) October 1, 8, 22, and 29. What’s the title? Where’s the poster?

We all need a little mystery in our lives, don’t we?

So I’ll be revealing those tantalizing details later, but for now, I need to talk about my non-writing task for the show: Props.

Yep, guys. I’m back on props duty, and I think I’m being far too casual about it. Maybe it’s the procrastination side of me, which could, quite possibly, be both sides. Maybe it’s because I might have it under control; I placed a big order on a one-day sale and saved $20, covering a big percentage of what we needed in the process.

And maybe it’s a little bit of that magic “I’ll get it done.” Because I will.

I assume.

Anyway, I’ll be breaking out the hot glue, the cold glue, and the glue that, if it gets on your fingers, you just have to live with your new hand.

Meanwhile, gather your thirteen dollarses, because you’ll be able to buy tickets very soon!

 

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

 Sign up for my spamless newsletter!

Slay Boredom with 10 Big Project Ideas

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Bored kids? Bored you? Feeling creative? Or want to daydream about something you might do eventually but probably won’t? Check out these fun projects you can do together, by yourself, or just read about doing.

10 Big Project Ideas for You and Your Kids (Vol. 1) by Charlie Baskins. $0.99 from Smashwords.com
Are you looking for a cool project to work on with or for your kids? This project presents 10 great ideas for doing something more than the ordinary, and gives inspiration on how to turn the mundane into the extraordinary! (Volume 1 of a series)