Today it’s sunny, and I just collected my second cup of coffee from the coffeemaker. Small pleasures.
It’s a week of coming to terms with things, including things I try to keep beyond a gauzy curtain, the outline only slightly visible, enough to pretend it’s not there at all. Perhaps you know what I mean.
Minds are set, opinions are set, villains and heroes are set, and I will forever be cast in the well with the villains, and there is no changing that. It doesn’t matter who I am as a person.
I know a lot of you know what I mean.
No pretending these days. It’s all right there in the open.
Clearly people are tired of hearing about it, too. I’ve broken the social contract, apparently, the one that requires me to pretend that the bigotry aimed at me isn’t bigotry, or isn’t big bigotry, or isn’t important bigotry, certainly not as important as the bigotry aimed at others.
It’s enough to wear a person out.
I’ve always been a person who expended a lot of energy for others, too much energy for others, and once you shift that, once you start using it for yourself, for your own benefit, there’s an odd kind of resistance.
Go figure.
But why shouldn’t some of the energy I have be to my benefit? Why shouldn’t most of the energy I have be to my benefit?
Why not all?
Well, to me, that sounds like too much, too self-centered. But what do I know, I’m not a Republican.
Anyway, that’s it for me today, have a great Friday and a lovely weekend.
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