It may shock you when I tell you it’s both sunny and cold. Yes, yes, I know, I know, very surprising for January.
Which is nearly over, though last week felt like three weeks all jumbled together.
Sometimes I hesitate to write these kinds of posts, as I’m afraid I’ll lasso others with my words and bring you down with me, but on the other hand, this is supposed to be our place for genuine, honest talk. So talk we will.
Lately I feel like I am the wrong shape for this world, a cube trying to squeeze into a sphere, to turn the phrase around a little.
This idea that we should be kind, that we should have empathy, that we should care about people who are not us, as of late, I’m starting to think was all a way to make us into easy marks. Suckers for the ones who are the examples of “true” humanity, such and sordid as it is.
We’ve seen their contempt for us for years and years, how our pain makes them laugh with glee. But the thing is, I thought we were the ones who had it all right.
The world has turned upside down, everything looks like a funhouse mirror to me but maybe I’ve been looking at it all wrong, all this time. Maybe it was all about the “givers” and the “takers” but the takers lie and lie and lie about who the takers actually are.
And I really don’t know what to do about this information.
I’m not sad, exactly, that mood has passed, and I’m not rageful, at least not at the moment. At best I am resigned; not in a way that I’m throwing my hands up, finding my teeny tiny marble and going home, but in a meeting reality where it is kind of way.
I clearly thought too much of people, as whole. I’ve clearly expected too much of people, as a whole.
It still boggles my mind that we’ve been down this road once, barely escaped it and people wanted to turn the car around. But I am at the point where I realize that whatever that reason, it will not make sense in my brain.
My connections cannot twist that way.
I’ve recently seen reports of people doing analyses, talking about the validity of the election, and all I can do is sigh and shake my head. Because at this point, it doesn’t practically matter.
What is done will not be undone, not by wishes or dreams or courts of law.
And though it very well may be true, that a win was transformed into a loss which was immediately accepted, what is also true is if it wasn’t close, it wouldn’t have worked.
I don’t know what tomorrow’s step is, but today’s step is this and only this: viewing the world as it stands, rose-colored glasses shattered and useless on the ground.
Have a solid, productive start to your week.
A Bit to Read 
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