V is for Very (Short)

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Well, I still have my cold, and I also have errands that have to be done today, as tomorrow will not work. Sigh. So that means today’s post is, as promised, very, very short. I am woefully behind on my blog visits (sorry) but hopefully I will catch up tomorrow.

Let’s hope these germs take a hike relatively quickly.

And now here’s a pretty photo just because.

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Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

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U is for Under (the Weather)

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I can hear what you’re thinking already, hypothetical reader. Actually, I can always hear what you’re thinking, because that is how this works. Convenient, no?

Anyway, in a stroke of what might look like suspiciously good timing, it seems I have caught a cold. I am sneezy, coughy, and generally feeling blah. Alas.

Have I really, hypothetical reader? Why the skepticism? Because the cold seems to have blossomed on the perfect day, alphabet-wise?

I agree, the timing is a little suspect, but that’s because I think it’s the universe kinda messing with me. Because today, those men who like to hang out dozens of stories in the air are literally outside my window.

Literally.

Hmm, sorry, I should have put a label on this post. WARNING: whining ahead.

So on a day when I would like nothing better than a little silence so I could battle these germs as nature intended — asleep — instead I have the, well, you know. My brain is too germ-ridden to come up with something creative at the moment. Besides, you know the drill by now.

Ha. The drill. Get it? Drill? Because they’re…never mind.

What’s that, hypothetical reader?Am I sure there’s nothing stronger than water in my cup right now? I am completely sure, thank you. I mean no one needs to be intoxicated to enjoy a good pun. Sure it helps, but it’s not necessary.

Oh well, it’s only a cold after all. It will pass eventually, I hope sooner rather than later. And I will try to look on the bright side. The vibration from the drilling is like getting one of those massage chairs for free. Sorta.

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

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T is for Totally (Behind)

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Oh dear. Here we are on Thursday, and I still haven’t written my scene for class tonight. My last class, as it happens. Don’t worry, I’m signed up for the next one, they all roll seamlessly into one another, and aside from a week without homework, it’s business as usual.

Well, not exactly as usual, it’s a new teacher with the new class, so we’ll see how that goes. I’ve really enjoyed this one, he’s sharp, obviously an excellent writer, and he’s got a finely-honed sense of humor.

See what I did there? Veering away from the topic at hand? Yes, hypothetical reader, that’s exactly what I’ve been doing with this homework assignment. Every time I start going on it, something else beckons.

I thought I made some progress yesterday, but I really don’t like the way the thing is working. Or, to be more accurate, not working. So I’m not sure I’m going to keep it.

But to top off the whole thing, the drilling today is up close and personal as they say. As who says, hypothetical reader? I’m not sure, but I’d think “they” are located somewhere in your neighborhood.

So I’ll probably have to go somewhere to get the work done, if what’s happening right now — the sound of a growling enormous monster gnawing down to the metal — keeps up, it is going to be tough to focus. As if it wasn’t already.

As I said, oh dear

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

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S is for Slowing (Down)

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OK, so here we are at the bottom end of the alphabet, and I have to admit that I’m not as quick with ideas as I was at the start. And let’s be honest, it’s not as though S is a terribly challenging letter. It’s utterly swimming with possibilities.

It’s funny how things change with a little perspective, with a little time in. Things that seem easy at first intensify in their challenge; things that were hard become easier.

I wish I was a little sillier today, a little more frivolous, but it seems my sense of humor is off on its own, probably having the time of its life, as senses of humor tend to do. And that’s going to be problematic, because I have homework for my comedy writing class due tomorrow.

It’s kind of a basic requirement for comedy that it should be funny, right? Or maybe not, depending on the comedian. Combination ba-dum-bum/snap. Though that was a pretty nonspecific snap if ever there was one. And yes, today is retro insult day, why do you ask?

So hopefully my humor is just taking a nap, as we all likely want to do, and will be easily reachable with the time comes to tackle my scene. Or maybe I can claim that it’s some kind of meta anti-humor, that it’s funny in its utter lack of funniness. That seems like it could be a thing, right?

No? Really?

Hmm.

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

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R is for Really (Overboard)

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Yesterday I languished in the absence of construction noise, enjoying every moment of a day without a metal bit chewing through very reluctant concrete. And instead of taking advantage to get work done, I was, if I’m being honest, very lazy.

What’s that, hypothetical reader? You’ve noticed a procrastinaty trend running through these posts? I suppose that is a fair assessment. But I’ve had an excellent reason.

Sorry, hypothetical reader, you’ll have to speak up. What was the reason? Well, it was excellent, as I said. I’m afraid I can’t hear you, hypothetical reader. Our connection seems to be very bad, and no, I can’t be more specific.

So today we have wind, a lot of wind, the kind of wind that rattles the windows and the brand-new leaves. No men scaling buildings today, not with that kind of a wind.

For anyone keeping track, that’s two in a row. Two in a row. Woo-hoo.

And though my instinct is to indulge that cozy, lazy vibe, to look at the ominous clouds and listen to the drone of the wind, wrap myself in a fuzzy blanket and marathon something, anything, that is not what I’m going to do today. No really, hypothetical reader.

What’s that? You’re saying that I can hear you? The line must have cleared. You know, they do that sometimes. Oops, sorry, losing you again.

That’s the thing. It can be so tempting, when something has been particularly pleasant, to really push into it, to curl up into it, and stick with it. But often, it’s the uniqueness of a moment or a day or an opportunity that makes it so satisfying. You take that away, and you just have routine.

So I will not go overboard enjoying my silence today. I will get work done. I will be effective. And I will listen to the wind, because a wind like that one doesn’t come along often.

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

Sign up for my spamless newsletter. And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

 

Q is for Quiet (Maybe)

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I probably shouldn’t be writing about this. I’m probably jinxing it with every letter I type, but with the skies gloomy and the wind huffing, it appears that the facade is being left to its own devices today. Or at least for now.

Could it be? Could I really have silence today? Or at least a kind of city quiet, filled with the drone of cars going by, with occasional truck rumblings, with the sirens piercing and then gone.

We’ll see.

Yesterday I stocked up on earplugs, 80 pairs of them, to gird me against the noise ahead. I also got some noise ear muffs, so I can look like one of those people who works the runway, directing imaginary planes down the hallway.

I prepared, but still had the secret hope that somehow, the work would be stalled today, and stalled it was. Yay!

Last week was a loud week, one where the grinding vibrated through my skin into my bones, no matter how I tried to ignore it. Yes, this means it might take a little longer, but on the other hand, sometimes you’ve got to have a little bit of the plus-side now, you can’t always wait for everything. Little rewards here and there.

Like a dark day with no men on the side of the building.

I never thought that would be at the top of my wish list, but here it is. And I have to say, now that I have it (maybe), it’s awfully sweet. I wonder what the weather’s supposed to be like tomorrow.

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

Sign up for my spamless newsletter. And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

P is for Promotion (Self)

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I’ve decided to combine my laziness today with the undeniable urge to push my own work. Winning combination, no? No?

OK, fair point.

Nonetheless, today I am going to dangle a little Aunty Ida in front of you, though you might want to make sure you’re wearing your protective brain gear. On account of the likelihood that she wants to get her hands in your noggin.

Probably metaphorically speaking. Probably.

Anyway, in Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), Margaret really doesn’t have much of a choice. If she wants to keep her job as a judge after her tiny, minuscule little meltdown live on LawTV, she’s got to let Aunt Ida help her. It doesn’t matter, though, because Margaret knows none of it was her fault. She was set up, and she’s going to prove it.

Here’s the cover:

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Yes, Aunty Ida is weird. Yes, Aunty Ida is a weird book. But don’t we weirdos need a place to hang out, even if it’s only between pixelated pages? See, that’s what I thought.

And so ends our latest self-promotion bulletin. I hope that no sensibilities were injured in the making of this post.

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

Sign up for my spamless newsletter. And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!