H Time With Her Cousin, Much Removed

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cozy final coverI wasn’t going to do this. I swear, I wasn’t going to, but then somehow fellow A-to-Z Challenge blogger John Davis Frain came across last year’s H post, and it’s Saturday, and I have stuff to do, and the sun is shining for the first time in nearly a week, and I guess what I’m saying here is please enjoy my recycled post. It’s just good for the environment.

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Sorry folks. It had to be done. I know, I know, it’s all kinds of self-promotion-y, but sometimes you just have to do a little horn tooting, break out the old soapbox and wave your carnival cane. A carnival cane is a thing, right?

Anyway, with H we are talking about my cozy mystery, Her Cousin, Much Removedwhich is available for Kindle, and free to read with Kindle Unlimited or Amazon Prime.

What’s that you say, hypothetical reader? I seem to be doing the bulk of the talking? Point taken. Now please let me get on with flogging my wares.

Venetia Shipman only wanted her platter back, the one she lent her sorta cousin, Delenda. But now Delenda’s been murdered, and that’s only the beginning of Venetia’s problems. Yep, Delenda was up to some not-so-great stuff, and Venetia’s the one who’s paying for it.

See? Was that so terrible? What’s that, hypothetical reader? You can’t wait to read Her Cousin, Much Removed? It sounds like a fun, mysterious romp with twists, humor and, of course, platters? Oh, stop, hypothetical reader. You flatter me.

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

Sign up for my spamless newsletter. And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

P is for Promotion (Self)

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I’ve decided to combine my laziness today with the undeniable urge to push my own work. Winning combination, no? No?

OK, fair point.

Nonetheless, today I am going to dangle a little Aunty Ida in front of you, though you might want to make sure you’re wearing your protective brain gear. On account of the likelihood that she wants to get her hands in your noggin.

Probably metaphorically speaking. Probably.

Anyway, in Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), Margaret really doesn’t have much of a choice. If she wants to keep her job as a judge after her tiny, minuscule little meltdown live on LawTV, she’s got to let Aunt Ida help her. It doesn’t matter, though, because Margaret knows none of it was her fault. She was set up, and she’s going to prove it.

Here’s the cover:

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Yes, Aunty Ida is weird. Yes, Aunty Ida is a weird book. But don’t we weirdos need a place to hang out, even if it’s only between pixelated pages? See, that’s what I thought.

And so ends our latest self-promotion bulletin. I hope that no sensibilities were injured in the making of this post.

Check out  my full-length novels,  Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), and the sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) which is now available!

Sign up for my spamless newsletter. And download Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free!

The Aunty Has Landed!

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Well, it’s here! Aunty Ida finally has a second adventure, and you can read it, right now, if you want. Go ahead, stop what you’re doing. Unless you’re driving. Although if you’re driving, why are you reading this blog? Eyes on the road!

Anyway, you can now get Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) on Amazon, if you are so inclined. You might want to read Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only) first, though. Or not if you’re a rebel.

Aunty Ida loves rebels.

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So I hope it’s another fun visit to the world of Aunty Ida, and I hope you leave it with your brain intact. Or mostly intact. You can’t have everything.

One More Day Until Aunty Ida is Back!

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So excitement is in the air. At least it’s in the air over here. I could be mistaking it for the frigid temperatures, but I don’t think so.

The Aunty Ida sequel, Aunty Ida’s Holey Amazing Sleeping Preparation (Not Doctor Recommended) comes out tomorrow! In case you have forgotten what it looks like:

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It’s available for pre-order until it is released on January 7, and I really can’t seem to think about everything else. I hope the people who enjoyed the weird and funny world of Aunty Ida the first time will have just as much fun — or more — this time around. Brian’s not going to have as good a time, but that’s pretty much standard for one of Ida’s guinea pigs. I mean experiments. I mean patients.

Hmm.

Anyway, tomorrow should be pretty exciting. For everyone but Brian.

Last Chance to Get Aunty Ida for FREE!

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What funny and weird and totally free? Aunty Ida! And today, December 27, is your last chance to pick up a copy of Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only) for FREE! Get one now, you know you want to. Or, to be more accurate, Aunty Ida knows you want to.

Ida1What do you mean, “How does she know?” She knows. She knows everything. Well, almost everything.

 

Reminder, Aunty Ida is FREE Today and Tomorrow!

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If you haven’t gotten your copy of Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only), what are you waiting for? It’s free through tomorrow, December 27. Get it while it’s still loony. Or before you’re loony. One of those two things.

Though it’s also convenient if you’re already loony. Oh well, it doesn’t matter, just get reading!

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I hope you enjoy it, and your long weekend, if you have one.

 

 

Guess Where I Am Today?

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More editingGo on, guess! That’s right, you got it. While I’m pushing through this next editing pass, don’t fear. You can always get one of my books, Her Cousin Much Removed,  The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management, Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, and Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only) to pass the time. You can even borrow them with Amazon Prime or read them for free with Kindle Unlimited. And Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities is just plain free. Enjoy, and see you back here soon.

 

 

Since You Asked…

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Have you joined Kindle Unlimited? If you have, my books are free to read. What’s that, you say? You are so subtle with your self-promotion that I had no idea that you had books available for reading? Yes, hypothetical reader, and thank you for that remarkably, spontaneously perfect question. I have two offbeat humorous sci-fi books, a less-offbeat, humorous cozy mystery, and a collection of, hmm, unusual flash fiction short stories (which is free free on Amazon.com).

Sorry, hypothetical reader, I couldn’t quite hear you over the hammering/drilling combo I have going on today, you’ll have to speak up. What was that? Oh, you’d like to know more about these books? Oh, stop, hypothetical reader, you’re embarrassing me!

But if you insist…

Humorous Science Fiction:

Aunty Ida’s Full-Service Mental Institution (by Invitation Only)

The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management

Cozy Mystery:


Her Cousin, Much Removed

Short Story Collection:

Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities

 

The Great Paradox of P

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P can only mean one thing for me, and that’s paradox. More specifically, time paradox. I was watching something science-fictiony involving time travel when, as usual, the characters took great pains to avoid seeing themselves, because doing so would create a time paradox. I couldn’t help but wonder, what happens if you face the time paradox straight on? What happens if you let the characters meet themselves?

And so The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management was born. It takes place in a world where humans have mastered time–or, at least, they think they have–and looks at how that would likely turn out, given human nature.

Not well, as  a rule.

In Amber’s universe, time is controlled in the Time Management Center, where she’s a clerk processing time files. She’s been a little bit of a bad  woman when it comes to her files, and it’s about to catch up with her.


The Great Paradox and the Innies and Outies of Time Management by Isa-Lee Wolf. Amazon for $2.99. Avoid the time paradox, they say. Paradoxes will rip apart the very essence of space and time, they warn.

Oops.

It’s too late for that for Amber, a clerk at the Time Management Center, who spends her days filing time innies, outies and midlies. When she finds herself being hauled up the side of Mount Chicago, sprawled over the shoulder of a man she doesn’t know, she senses that something is off. Then again, it happened on the heels of one of her lowest days, a day she was relieved was over. Until it wasn’t. The Spokes, which should keep everything when it’s supposed to be, aren’t doing their job, and it doesn’t help that their coffee’s not so great either.

Even worse, the whirling cone of infinity is back in her kitchen, she keeps running into herself everywhere, and people are on to her about what she was doing—but shouldn’t have been doing—with her time files. For Amber, the Great Time Paradox is vastly overrated.

Offbeat Letter O

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With O we head for one of my favorite words: offbeat. I love the weird, I love the unusual, as you can see by the titles of my non-cozy mystery books (as in, the rest of them). It’s a different way of looking at the world, a way of seeing through the surface of us as people and the world we create. It’s finding a new angle for the light to bounce off and see what lies below.

Offbeat, I think, implies a sense of humor about oddness, about being different. Sometimes it’s a conscious decision not to walk in step with everyone else, sometimes it’s because it’s just impossible to find the rhythm, but offbeat doesn’t care. It is what it is and it’s fine with it.

The offbeat, in life, can take you places you wouldn’t think to go. It takes the absurd and makes it absurder. Which I didn’t think was a real word, but spell check’s telling me is A-OK.

It’s more than fine to not fit in. Sometimes, it’s glorious.

In honor of the offbeat, check out my flash fiction collection, Better Living Through GRAVY and Other Oddities, it’s free! Or try my other offbeat novels, if you want. Here they are, because the single cover looked lonely.

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